I am a statistic… and I’m not referring to myself as one of the 9 of 10 doctors that agree that Tylenol is the most effective pain medicine. No, in reality, I am one of the thousands of dipshits that thought it would be a fantastic idea to buy a condo in Southern California in [...]
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Ultraparadoxical
I was just thinking that I was going to make up some lame excuse about how I was not writing a post today when really it was because I could not think of anything to write about. Writers never get enough credit for the things that they do. Actors and actresses get all of the [...]
I walked out of my apartment today and I was greeted with the normal cavalcade of hobos doing their various hobo things when I looked in a vacant store window and saw this: Wet Willies: coming soon. Fuck. Me. This “bar” is in the same building as my apartment and although it is not directly [...]
The other day I was talking with someone and they were complaining about a random annoyance in their life. It was one of the trivial things that everyone complains about that really are not that big a deal. I don’t even remember what it was but at the end of her rant I told her [...]
I am finally getting a camera-phone (I know, welcome to 2006, Mr. Ultraparadoxical). The corporate blackberry I had been using did not have that capability but I am getting a new one by next week. Besides the obvious bonus of being able to send pictures of my genitalia to my friends and loved ones it [...]
I went back home to Chicago this weekend to hang out with friends and celebrate a buddy’s birthday. It was a great time in addition to being a learning experience. Here are some of the things that I found out: Phones don’t work properly – BB (my friend who was celebrating his birthday) got a [...]
I came into work today and one of my co-workers dropped a bomb on me. He said he fucked my Mother. Just kidding! – that did actually (maybe) happen to Lebron James right before game 4 of the Eastern Conference Semi-finals. Allegedly Delonte West, one of Lebron’s teammates, has been “driving the lane” on Lebron’s [...]
Note: This is a continuation from a previous post about various road trip experiences I have had – if you have not read it you can catch up here. Ontario – “Wait… was that a sign for New York?” Sophomore year in college I organized a winter formal in Toronto, Ontario. The main reason was [...]
I have been on many dates in my life. Some good, some bad and some in between. There is one night that is the current and probably will forever be the reigning champ for worst first date I have ever been on. It all started innocently enough after I met this chick at the bar [...]
[Editor's note: I have tried to get a few friends to come up with something for the site... most have failed (I'm looking in your direction KS and BB). One has not however - presenting for the first time... TK! You may remember her as the confused traveler in "A Concert Story II". She used [...]